in case you didn't know

i have two new blogs now:

my personal blog: http://zachjepayne.blogspot.com/

my poetry blog: http://zestelpoems.blogspot.com/

Valentine's Day ...

Bah humbug.

The end.


Or is it?
I couldn't tell you.
But probably.

There's room for a miracle today,
but I don't see it happening.

and i sigh

because it seems like each day is meaningless against the fabric of life. what is being accomplished? what is being done? is anything good coming out of this pain; this hardship? what is the purpose of loving, living, fighting, dying, being?

loving, i suppose, is my reason; even though i doubt that's doing much good.

Car c'est en espérance que nous sommes sauvés. Or, l'espérance qu'on voit n'est plus espérance: ce qu'on voit, peut-on l'espérer encore?

lotro, baby.

i miss LOTRO


< the Lord of the Rings Online MMORPG>
I haven't played since . . . March/April '08
but I find myself missing the camaraderie and violence,
the Rift raids and the fun.

I found my old kinship (guild) on FaceBook,
and requested to join their group, hopefully they'll take me up.
As soon as I get a paying job, I am getting back on.

I realized that my parents/family might get upset at me,
for playing LOTRO again, since I got quite addicted last time
then I realized, I'm A FUCKING ADULT!! HAHAHA

God is good, all the time

tournesol.

the French word for sunflower.

I want to shine bright for you, to be your morning star. I was a black hole once, but each day I am reborn, by HIS grace and HIS strength, made into somebody worth being.

I start anew because I love you, and I want to be somebody that you love as well. I want to be strong, even though I fall into anger's hands so easily.

This entire blog has been cleared :) Hopefully something good will come of this new start.

Zach Estel.